Yes, I’m still here, and yes, I’m still clocking the miles. I just haven’t had the strength to blog about. Since Pam did such a wonderful job posting about our 16 miler with pics and all, I didn’t feel the need to “over-blog” her :).
I have been going through a wave of emotions the past couple of weeks. After my awful 14 miler a few weeks ago, I questioned my sanity about this whole 50k goal. But then after an awesome 16 miler that Pam posted about, I thought, wow, I can do this. There’s nothing to it, just make sure you properly fuel, take it easy on the hills, and you’ll do fine. Then last week I had an emotionally trying week, which in turn caused me to be stressed and very tired (found out my daughter lost her job, found out I have impingement syndrome in my left shoulder, our pet rat died, blah, blah, blah). I didn’t want to do a damn thing, let alone keep up my training. But, I did the best that I could with the energy that I had.
This past weekend was a cycle down week, which was greatly needed. Saturday was to be 10 miles and Sunday 7.5 miles at Diane’s FLTRS. Saturday was a lot of fun, Pam and I met at Karen’s Bakery in Folsom and set out with 2 other friends, Pam and Lynn. Not even a mile in on the trail and we hit a MAJORLY flooded area that we couldn’t get around due to extremely high berry (sticker) bushes. So we somehow made a path through the bushes and headed up to a higher trail. Needless to say we stayed on the bike trail until we got past the major flooding areas. It stayed relatively dry for us, so the run turned out to be a really nice one.
Sunday morning, I woke up tired, but headed out to Beale’s Point to help with the set-up of the race. I was feeling a little out of sorts, but did what I could to help. As it got closer to start time, something was said to me that really upset me. I can’t even tell you what it was exactly that was said because it was so quick and the subject was changed so quickly that I didn’t even have time to react. I felt the comment was unjustified and certainly in poor timing, what with me getting ready to start a race within 30 minutes. But, nevertheless, it was said and it really upset me.
I had a hard time getting started. Pam wasn’t there with me and I was out there by myself dwelling over the comment, not being able to focus on my run, but after a couple of miles I was able to tune into my iPod and just go with the flow. I was feeling really good, got into a really good groove, and went to the beat of the music. Then as I got closer to the finish line, my thoughts went back to the comment and the person and all of sudden I didn’t want to finish, so I struggled to get the last mile done. I finished in 1:34, not bad since my goal was 1:30.
Once again, my brain is going to be nemesis!! I’ve got to really work on the psychological end of this whole thing. I’ve definitely come to the conclusion that I no longer want my life revolving around my running (which it is), it needs to be the other way around. I will be glad when this training is over and I can go back to enjoying the run, when I want to run, spending more time with my hubby, and getting in some much needed golf!
Until then, the training continues with us doing 18 miles this weekend. We’re going to start at Twin Rocks in
Here’s to staying dirty and enjoying the trails!!
I love reading your posts, Shannon! Don't ever worry you'll 'overpost' over me. I don't care in the least. Your posts are much more lively and enjoyable!! I am so proud of you for doing the race on Sunday when you were going thru some emotional stuff. See how strong you are??
ReplyDeleteThanks Pam. It helps to have a strong support group and the sometimes intolerable need to never quit!! :)
ReplyDeleteThe mentality of this sport is often forgotten about when signing up for races. I am in the same boat as you with the overwhelming feelings, the urge and desire to be with family and just the thoughts that "life" is really getting in the way of running/training and should that REALLY be the way it is? But on March 13th when you cross the finish line at Cool and realize what you have accomplished and when your hubby and daughter look at you in awe, you'll realize what you're doing now was worth it. Good job and good luck!
ReplyDeleteMy "trick" for when someone says something that bothers me, particularly before a run, I spend the WHOLE run thinking of witty come backs I didn't get to say! :-)
Thanks trailmomma! You hit the nail on the head, running should not consume our "life", which it seems to be doing lately. And you're right, I know that when I cross the finish line on March 13th, all this will have been worth it!! And I'll be able to say, I DID IT!! I am now an Ultra Runner! Now if I can just get my hubby to come out and be there at the finish line - hhhmmm - He'll be golfing or fishing, no doubt - pooh head - LOL!
ReplyDeleteHi Shannon! Hang in there! I struggle with getting 'out of my head' sometimes too. The music definitely helps me and I try to remind myself not to think - just go with the music and the movement. You're doing great and I know you'll have an amazing experience at WTC. Oh, and if my signficant other ever shows up at races, I usually faint from shock. ;-) It's much better to celebrate with your ultra runner pals.
ReplyDeleteThanks Farmer Jen
ReplyDeleteYa, I think I'd faint too if he were to show up - LOL. Celebrating with the other crazies (ultra runners) who have just gone through what you went through is the best!
Power through this lull and you'll be better off for it! The goal is within reach and after WTC it's all gravy...
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